It's been a minute since I last wrote, and since I'm in a good mood, I thought I'd reflect on this past year.
Every Christmas at my mother's house we write down dreams/hopes/prayers for the next year. So every year we get to read last year's list and write a new list of goals for the upcoming year. A few days ago I was trying to think about what might be on my list from last Christmas. Specifically, would I have to face any hopes I had written about Gabriel and then it occurred to me that we didn’t even know about Gabriel last Christmas. In fact, at our first ultrasound, we were told that we probably conceived him on Christmas day.
It is mind blowing to me that in one year’s time I got pregnant with Gabriel, carried him for nine months, labored for weeks, held him for hours, and prepared his funeral.
In less than one year I went from carrying my son to burying my son.